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This season of American Horror Story has been a hoot thus far, deftly mixing humor and horror and never taking itself too seriously. That all changed this week as there was not a chuckle to be heard in this bleakest of bleak episodes with a storyline revolving around one little thing — a baby.
Yes, it’s time for Doris to give birth and with Harry at her side … well, he’s finding it difficult to concentrate on his wife while being drawn to all the blood-soaked materials around them. But he does focus and she has the baby, a boy. While she’s recovering and naps, he wheels the hazmat container out of the room and into a bathroom to … squeeze the blood out of the cloths into Dixie cups to consume. BLERK! Probably one of the most stomach-churning things this show has ever done and they’ve done a lot! And the next thing Doris knows, she wakes up in her own bed back in P-Town, and she’s not happy. She expected Harry and Alma to leave by that point while she was in Hyannis, but Harry assures her this is where they need to be for her own health and recovery. And Ursula has been there to help with things so she has nothing to worry about.
But she does. First she awakens to the baby crying but he’s not in his bassinet next to the bed. No, Doris finds him in Alma’s arms in the bathroom, her mouth firmly locked on to his little leg. Doris passes out, and when she awakens everyone tries to convince her it was just a dream, while keeping the baby firmly swaddled so she can’t really see anything but his face. Ursula brings her some soup and tells her about Harry’s sudden success, which Doris isn’t buying. Not that he isn’t a good writer, but he’s not prolific enough to have written a movie and two TV series in the short time they’ve been in Provincetown. Ursula tells her to just get on board this train and she won’t have to redecorate another house for the rest of her life. Harry, meanwhile, warns Alma that she is to never feed on her brother — even if baby’s blood so pure she can now play the hardest piece of music ever written (it drove the composer to suicide) — and if she does she’ll never get another pill.
But news of a baby in town has reached Belle, who insists that Karen bring the delectable treat to her … or else she’ll unleash the pale folk on her. Karen doesn’t want to take another baby but she knows she’ll have to or she’ll die. Belle found Karen at the beach after Mickey had given Karen a ride in his new sports car, the reward for his Speed Racer script which is being turned into an entire universe with him at the helm. He tells Karen he believes in her talent and they can be together forever if she just takes the pill. Karen refuses, but after her encounter with Belle she needs Mickey’s help to steal the baby so she can take it and protect it. She thinks that taking care of a baby will force her to take care of herself, but Mickey says he doesn’t think it actually works that way. But he will help her if it keeps her alive because … he does love her and he really wants to help her.
Back at the Gardner home, Doris can hear voices downstairs so she grabs a pair of scissors to see what’s going on. She finds Ursula on the phone making more deals for Harry, and in the dining room she overhears Harry and Holden Vaughn discussing the boards she’s already designed for the redecoration of the house. Or rather she hears Holden’s snide comments about how basic her designs are. He tries to cover up his disdain to tell her the designs are fine but lack vision, and Harry tries to calm her down before she stabs someone. The baby starts crying which triggers her lactation, and Harry tells her to go feed the baby.
While she’s feeding, Alma pays a visit to offer an apology for feeding on the baby. Earlier, Alma had come to give her mother some pills, saying Harry asked her to bring them to her. Among the pills was the black one but Doris didn’t recognize it and called out for Harry. He tried to feign ignorance but Alma just blurted out the truth about everything while Harry and Ursula were shocked into silence. Doris threw the pills on the floor, but now Alma is giving her a spiel about how the pill can make them all a family again, telling Doris that taking the pill will unleash all of her talent. Alma also suggests that Harry doesn’t believe in her talent but she does. And she’ll get used to the blood. This girl is a true salesman.
Doris allows Alma to give her the pill, and the next time we see her the bed is covered in drawing and designs. Doris is furiously scribbling away on a design for the living room but she’s having an issue with where to put a table. She finds herself in a bit of a rage and stumbles to the bathroom where she discovers … her hair is falling out. (Okay, we all knew this was going to happen, right?) Harry, Alma and Ursula go out for dinner, even though Harry thinks they should stay home and get take-out to be with Doris, but they cajole him into leaving. They are unaware that Mickey and Karen are lurking outside and when they all leave the pair goes around the back to break in and take the baby. There are some pale people on the beach but Mickey assures Karen they won’t hurt her as long as she’s with him. When they attempt to take the baby, they are confronted with raging Doris and Karen flees without the child.
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But she finds herself now surrounded by a horde of the untalented. Just as it seems it’s too late for her, Mickey shows up and they fall back. He tells her honestly that he loves her, they can have it all, and all she has to do is take the pill. She can create her one masterpiece that she wants to be remembered for, she just has to believe in herself as much as he believes in her. But she refuses to take the pill and he tells her this is goodbye then. But he does leave one pill with her just in case. As he leaves and the horde begins to surround her, she pops the pill and they all withdraw.
When Harry returns home, he discovers a now completely bald and raging Doris, horrified that Alma talked her into taking the pill. He knew this would happen, and Alma knew this would happen … and Ursula knew this would happen because she apparently helped coach Alma with how to sell her on taking the pill. They knew Doris would hold Harry back, and in the end … he knew it too. He confines her to the bathroom and confesses that he knew this day would come sooner or later, and perhaps for Doris this is best because they would have eventually divorced and it would have destroyed her to see him accepting all of his awards and dating one starlet after another. So he bundled her up and walked her out of the house and let her wander down the street, now just another untalented, rage-filled bloodsucker roaming the streets of Provincetown.
The next day, Karen and Mickey are basking in the glow of her decision to take the pill, and he tells her that in order to create her masterpiece she has to feed, but not to worry, he’ll take care of getting the blood for her. They go to the beach to the location she’s been trying to nail in her painting (that this is her idea of a masterpiece sort of tells us where Karen’s story may be heading), but before she starts she tells Mickey that what she’s going to do will save them both. She hugs him … and then rips a big chunk out of his neck, feeding on him until his body lay motionless in the sand. RIP, dear Mickey. Karen gets out her supplies and starts to paint with a fury, but is she actually painting her masterpiece? We never get to see it before she leaves the site and walks toward the ocean. As the waves crash at her feet, Karen slits open both of her arms and walks into the surf. RIP Karen.
Later that night, Ursula and Alma are taking a stroll to visit The Chemist. Ursula wants to strike a deal with her to provide her with the pills so she can have the most successful talent agency on the planet (and we are to assume that Ursula is not taking the pills, she’s just a smart cookie without them), and who can resist a cute little girl batting her eyelashes? Ursula is sure they will seal a deal. But as they pass he cemetery, they spot a shadowy figure hunched over. It’s Doris, feeding on a rabbit.
And so ends the penultimate episode of ‘Red Tide’. This one was a real downer but it certainly was still gripping and it doesn’t have that rush to the end each season of AHS usually has. Next week is the finale, and then we start ‘Death Valley’. Can that live up to the terrific season we’ve had so far?
What did you think of the season premiere? Sound off in the comments below!
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